There aren't many reasons to watch the Baltimore Orioles these days. The pitching staff collapsed about a month ago and while they score a fair amount of runs, they usually give up more. So unless you're a Birdland fanatic, I can only think of two reasons that you'd turn on the TV: you're a fan of the opposing team or you enjoy the easy back and forth of Gary Thorne and Jim Palmer, the Orioles TV broadcasters.
I tune in for Thorne and Palmer. Thorne is a great play by play guy. Knowledgeable, succinct and enthusiastic without being overly excited by the play of a last place team. He's my local version of the incomparable Vin Scully. Palmer is the truth teller. You've got to love a guy who says about the O's left fielder: "he doesn't have a clue about where to throw the ball."
So I actually turn to these guys when I could watch a team that might actually win on any given night, the Washington Nationals. The Nats broadcasters never saw a play that they couldn't spin or a pitching performance that they don't hometown to death. When a close play goes against the Nats, the umpire is always wrong. They are fast becoming my local version of the insufferable duo who broadcast the Chicago White Sox and give the score by calling the teams "the good guys" and "the bad guys."
The Nats would probably fire Jim Palmer like they did Rob Dibble. Dibble, you might recall, was a color commentator who was fun to listen to but was let go for questioning a player's toughness. And not just any player, but Stephen Strasburg, the pitching prodigy whose promising start was cut short by Tommy John surgery. In his place, they hired Mary Poppins to make sure that in Natsland everything's perfect in every way. Truth be damned.
Wednesday, July 20, 2011
Friday, July 15, 2011
Roger Clemens and a few post All Star Game notes
If you thought I could resist writing about the Roger Clemens trial fiasco, I tried but couldn't. But I'll keep it short. Yesterday a good friend of mine who doesn't not share my interest in baseball asked what I thought about the Clemens trial. She said she hadn't followed it much but was under the impression that perhaps he'd been railroaded. Hah.
I kept my reply short and simple. "Roger Clemens is a big jerk who almost certainly used steroids/HGH and lied about it to Congress, " I said. "The government lawyers were unbelievably careless in introducing evidence that the Judge had ruled inadmissible. A waste of everyone's time and money. I doubt he will ever be retried and he can go back to being a big jerk, " I concluded. And that's really all I feel like saying about it.
In response to a comment on the impact of interleague play on the All Star Game: I think interleague play does dilute the uniqueness of the ASG, especially since interleague play is scheduled so close to the ASG, but the real villan is the combination of TV and MLB which has turned a single game into a three day marathon. Add to that players who can't be bothered to attend and you have two days of meaninglessness and a game that's become a series of cameos by faux All Stars.
What's the wierdest day of the season? That's easy. It's the Wednesday after the ASG. No games on a Wednesday in the middle of the season. Just feels creepy.
And finally: I'm seriously considering calling the Commissioner's Office to comment on the suspension of two Baltimore Oriole pitchers who are appealing their three game suspensions for fighting in a recent game against the Red Sox. The Commissioner would do all Oriole fans a favor if he suspended Michael Gonzales and Kevin Gregg for the rest of the season. Do you think he might consider it? In the best interest of baseball and all of that....
I kept my reply short and simple. "Roger Clemens is a big jerk who almost certainly used steroids/HGH and lied about it to Congress, " I said. "The government lawyers were unbelievably careless in introducing evidence that the Judge had ruled inadmissible. A waste of everyone's time and money. I doubt he will ever be retried and he can go back to being a big jerk, " I concluded. And that's really all I feel like saying about it.
In response to a comment on the impact of interleague play on the All Star Game: I think interleague play does dilute the uniqueness of the ASG, especially since interleague play is scheduled so close to the ASG, but the real villan is the combination of TV and MLB which has turned a single game into a three day marathon. Add to that players who can't be bothered to attend and you have two days of meaninglessness and a game that's become a series of cameos by faux All Stars.
What's the wierdest day of the season? That's easy. It's the Wednesday after the ASG. No games on a Wednesday in the middle of the season. Just feels creepy.
And finally: I'm seriously considering calling the Commissioner's Office to comment on the suspension of two Baltimore Oriole pitchers who are appealing their three game suspensions for fighting in a recent game against the Red Sox. The Commissioner would do all Oriole fans a favor if he suspended Michael Gonzales and Kevin Gregg for the rest of the season. Do you think he might consider it? In the best interest of baseball and all of that....
Monday, July 11, 2011
Boycott the All-Star Game
I used to love the All-Star Game. When I was a kid, I would painstakingly prepare my scorecard for the game, leaving a lot of extra space between players to allow for multiple substitutions that would drive me crazy during the game. I almost never got those changes right. But I wouldn't miss it for the world. All those great players, the best pitchers, the best fielders, the best hitters in one place at one time.
Now it's a travesty. Now it's the best players that deign to come. Now the starting third basemen is batting .251. Now Fox TV is using it to promote its latest trashy TV show.
Yesterday some idiot announcer explained to me how badly the players needed the All Star break so they could go to the friggin beach. You'd think someone making $18 million for six months work could manage to drag his ass to the All Star game.
So after the Futures Game and the Home Run Derby I guess there will be an All Star Game and thanks to the fiasco of the tie game some years ago, it will "count". It will give the winning league home field advantage in the World Series. Fine. But I need a vacation too, even though I don't make $18 million a year. I'm going to the beach and I'm not watching.
Now it's a travesty. Now it's the best players that deign to come. Now the starting third basemen is batting .251. Now Fox TV is using it to promote its latest trashy TV show.
Yesterday some idiot announcer explained to me how badly the players needed the All Star break so they could go to the friggin beach. You'd think someone making $18 million for six months work could manage to drag his ass to the All Star game.
So after the Futures Game and the Home Run Derby I guess there will be an All Star Game and thanks to the fiasco of the tie game some years ago, it will "count". It will give the winning league home field advantage in the World Series. Fine. But I need a vacation too, even though I don't make $18 million a year. I'm going to the beach and I'm not watching.
Sunday, July 10, 2011
The Artful Dodger's Arbitrary Awards
On the eve of the midsummer classic, it's time for the Arbitrary Awards for the first half of the 2011 season.
The Most Complete Collapse of a Pitching Staff: The Baltimore Orioles starters have allowed 92 hits in the last seven games and amassed an ERA of 8.01 over the last month. They defy the trend of low scoring well pitched games that we are seeing all over baseball. It's a young pitching staff and instead of picking up a veteran pitcher in free agency, the Birds opted to spend their shekels on Mark Reynolds. This move alone is enough to earn them the There's a Sucker Born Every Off-Season award as Reynolds once again tries to set the record for most strikeouts and lowest batting average in a season. But he hits homeruns.
Best Pitcher You've Never Heard Of Award: Jair Jurrgens of Atlanta. With 12 wins and an ERA of 1.87 he wins over Kevin Correia of the Pirates but only because Kevin's ERA is too high. Jurrgens would also win for most alliterative name.
The Proving Once Again that you Can't Skip a Step Award: To Mike Leake of the Cinncinnati Reds who last year went from the college campus via the draft straight to the major leagues. After a good start followed by arm fatigue and a stint on the DL last year, Leake was optioned to the minors this May for a time and is now back with the Reds. Sometime in the middle of all this, Leake was arrested for shoplifting at Macys. But he didn't need to do that to get this award.
Most Annoying New Color Commentator: Hands down FP Santangelo of the Nationals who never met a silence that he didn't feel compelled to fill. The guy talks non-stop, usually in cliches, often repeating what he just said. My unsolicited advice: calm down, relax and occasionally shut-up.
Biggest off season Free Agent Busts: awarded to Adam Dunn and Dan Uggla neither of whom are batting above .200. The tie-breaker would be strikeouts which Dunn would win hands down. He has struck out 115 times in 266 at bats. Coming on strong as the All Star Game approaches is Jason Werth who lately has served as a human rally killer for Washington.
Question to ponder: why do so many pitchers wear those clunky color-coordinated necklaces? Do they think they look nice? Is it a superstition? A vodoo ritual?
The Most Complete Collapse of a Pitching Staff: The Baltimore Orioles starters have allowed 92 hits in the last seven games and amassed an ERA of 8.01 over the last month. They defy the trend of low scoring well pitched games that we are seeing all over baseball. It's a young pitching staff and instead of picking up a veteran pitcher in free agency, the Birds opted to spend their shekels on Mark Reynolds. This move alone is enough to earn them the There's a Sucker Born Every Off-Season award as Reynolds once again tries to set the record for most strikeouts and lowest batting average in a season. But he hits homeruns.
Best Pitcher You've Never Heard Of Award: Jair Jurrgens of Atlanta. With 12 wins and an ERA of 1.87 he wins over Kevin Correia of the Pirates but only because Kevin's ERA is too high. Jurrgens would also win for most alliterative name.
The Proving Once Again that you Can't Skip a Step Award: To Mike Leake of the Cinncinnati Reds who last year went from the college campus via the draft straight to the major leagues. After a good start followed by arm fatigue and a stint on the DL last year, Leake was optioned to the minors this May for a time and is now back with the Reds. Sometime in the middle of all this, Leake was arrested for shoplifting at Macys. But he didn't need to do that to get this award.
Most Annoying New Color Commentator: Hands down FP Santangelo of the Nationals who never met a silence that he didn't feel compelled to fill. The guy talks non-stop, usually in cliches, often repeating what he just said. My unsolicited advice: calm down, relax and occasionally shut-up.
Biggest off season Free Agent Busts: awarded to Adam Dunn and Dan Uggla neither of whom are batting above .200. The tie-breaker would be strikeouts which Dunn would win hands down. He has struck out 115 times in 266 at bats. Coming on strong as the All Star Game approaches is Jason Werth who lately has served as a human rally killer for Washington.
Question to ponder: why do so many pitchers wear those clunky color-coordinated necklaces? Do they think they look nice? Is it a superstition? A vodoo ritual?
Friday, July 8, 2011
The Forgotten Man
Between ESPN and the New York Times, coverage of Derek Jeter's 3000th hit has reached epic proportions. I'm pretty tired of all Jeter all the time and would rather just give him the three hits he need to reach 3000 and be done with it.
It's not that the accomplishment itself is not worthy of mention. It's that the coverage is so over the top that you'd think he was the only player in recent history to reach the 3000 hit mark. Jeter is, to borrow a phrase, likeable enough. Especially when compared with some of his teammates - the one who lied about taking steroids or the one whose shaving commercial can only make you cringe, for example. And I'm okay with hearing what a great guy he is and how he's played for the same team his whole career and how hard it is to get 3000 hits.
But what I what to remind all those folks who want to nominate Jeter for sainthood is that just a few years ago another guy reached that mark and nobody outside of Texas seemed to notice. Craig Biggio of the Houston Astros joined the 3000 hit club in June of 2007. Biggio spent his entire twenty year career with the Astros, coming up as a catcher, moving to the outfield when they asked him to and moving again, this time to second base, where he spent most of his time. He was always diving after balls or sliding headfirst to try to take an extra base.You could always pick out Biggio even without your glasses: his uniform was the dirtiest.
He performed on a smaller stage than Sir Derek. He and Patti raised three kids in Houston and became the spokesman for The Sunshine Kids Foundation, which provides support for children with cancer. By the time he retired, Biggio had raised $2 million for the Sunshine Kids. He seldom appeared without a small yellow sun on his cap.
And his 3000th hit? Oh yeah, I remember. Tagged out at second trying to stretch a single into a double.
It's not that the accomplishment itself is not worthy of mention. It's that the coverage is so over the top that you'd think he was the only player in recent history to reach the 3000 hit mark. Jeter is, to borrow a phrase, likeable enough. Especially when compared with some of his teammates - the one who lied about taking steroids or the one whose shaving commercial can only make you cringe, for example. And I'm okay with hearing what a great guy he is and how he's played for the same team his whole career and how hard it is to get 3000 hits.
But what I what to remind all those folks who want to nominate Jeter for sainthood is that just a few years ago another guy reached that mark and nobody outside of Texas seemed to notice. Craig Biggio of the Houston Astros joined the 3000 hit club in June of 2007. Biggio spent his entire twenty year career with the Astros, coming up as a catcher, moving to the outfield when they asked him to and moving again, this time to second base, where he spent most of his time. He was always diving after balls or sliding headfirst to try to take an extra base.You could always pick out Biggio even without your glasses: his uniform was the dirtiest.
He performed on a smaller stage than Sir Derek. He and Patti raised three kids in Houston and became the spokesman for The Sunshine Kids Foundation, which provides support for children with cancer. By the time he retired, Biggio had raised $2 million for the Sunshine Kids. He seldom appeared without a small yellow sun on his cap.
And his 3000th hit? Oh yeah, I remember. Tagged out at second trying to stretch a single into a double.
Wednesday, July 6, 2011
Jose Bautista
I've been studiously avoiding Jose Bautista for almost two years now. After all, some guy who has bounced around from team to team (even the Pirates got rid of him) who all of a sudden starts belting the ball out of the park, you think I'm going to fall for that again.
But 7.1 million All Star votes later and I'm ready to listen. So I did. Watched an interview with Bautista on cbssports.com and came away impressed. He's a size medium, articulate and has an explanation for the power surge in Toronto: they trained him to start his swing earlier. So do I go all in for a guy who went from a career .240 hitter with 15 home runs a year to Ted Williams of the North? A guy who after six years of obscurity hit 54 home runs last year and is on pace to do it again this season while boosting his batting average by 60 points?
I'm tempted but after sitting in Big Mac land in 1998 and watching an outsize slugger who used to be a skinny kid in Oakland hold a bat like it was a toothpick I'm not sure. After the human characature that was Sammy Sosa and Honest Abe Palmiero it pays to be careful. I bought in to the hype and the spectacle back then even tho I knew better. Bautista's transformation defies all logic. But I'm watching and hoping for the best.
But 7.1 million All Star votes later and I'm ready to listen. So I did. Watched an interview with Bautista on cbssports.com and came away impressed. He's a size medium, articulate and has an explanation for the power surge in Toronto: they trained him to start his swing earlier. So do I go all in for a guy who went from a career .240 hitter with 15 home runs a year to Ted Williams of the North? A guy who after six years of obscurity hit 54 home runs last year and is on pace to do it again this season while boosting his batting average by 60 points?
I'm tempted but after sitting in Big Mac land in 1998 and watching an outsize slugger who used to be a skinny kid in Oakland hold a bat like it was a toothpick I'm not sure. After the human characature that was Sammy Sosa and Honest Abe Palmiero it pays to be careful. I bought in to the hype and the spectacle back then even tho I knew better. Bautista's transformation defies all logic. But I'm watching and hoping for the best.
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